Monday, May 30, 2011

Come get some Face Time on June 24

We find ourselves differing with people all the time. Let’s talk about the subset of time when we feel the difference is important – maybe about how to pursue a particular business strategy or how to discipline our child. Sometime if the opposition is too strong, we will choose not to speak up.


Think of that! Here we are, differing on something you feel is very important, and you won't speak up because your counterpart has some kind of mojo that keeps you from challenging them! Maybe you worry that they will embarrass you, or will bully you, and have the kind of power over you that can make things difficult for you if you were to make them angry. So you don’t speak up.

Let’s say, though, that you DO speak up. You challenge their position. You show just how formidable you can be - and they force you into saying something you regret. All the blood drains from your face as your worst fears are realized and you wish you had never said anything. THIS is the memory that haunts many people. This is the reason they don’t speak up.

Let me retrace a few things:

1) The worry is baseless. You can conduct this conversation and manage it even if it is a very sensitive or emotional topic. The mojo you think your counterpart has is not their own.

2) You don’t have to challenge their position. You can help them formulate a new one.

3) You don’t have to show anyone how forceful or formidable you can be. You don’t have to apply force to move through these discussions.

4) You can conduct these discussions and lead them just where you want them to go. You may not always get your way, but you usually will if your way is reasonable.

5) Your counterpart will respect the way that you conduct yourself even if they disagree with your perspective. That will make subsequent discussions much easier.

One of the hardest things to do is to start saying the RIGHT THINGS to make all this happen, because you haven’t learned how to construct the RIGHT THINGS in your own voice, or even what makes them right.

I’d like to help and will be sharing some information along these lines at the June 24 PMI Breakfast event in Rancho Bernardo (info at http://www.eventbee.com/member/pmi-sd/event?eventid=832818314).
Please come out to get your questions answered.


Insist on great business results! Go to Pathfinder Communication

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